National Lampoon’s Hurricane Vacation
Call me Ishmael.
Like most St. Simons residents, my parents and I evacuated the island Thursday before Hurricane Matthew arrived. Unlike most St. Simons residents, I didn’t bother to start looking online for hotels until 3:00 p.m. on Thursday. The closest pet-friendly hotel I could find was in Greenville, SC which is 6 hours away. So, at 5:00 p.m. Thursday, we headed off the island with three adults and three dogs on the first “family vacation” I’ve been on since 1978.
Three night stay in the Greenville Comfort Inn & Suites - $621
Gasoline - $125
Dining out - $350
Spending quality time with your family and 160-pound drooling Newfoundland dog for hours in the car and days in a hotel room = Priceless
Rather than go into details of our “adventure,” I thought I’d sum up our trip using the opening lines from various great novels:
“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of wisdom, it was the age of foolishness, it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity, it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.” —Charles Dickens, A Tale of Two Cities
“Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” —Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina
“Granted: I am an inmate of a mental hospital; my keeper is watching me, he never lets me out of his sight; there's a peephole in the door, and my keeper's eye is the shade of brown that can never see through a blue-eyed type like me.” —GŸnter Grass, The Tin Drum
“All this happened, more or less.”—Kurt Vonnegut, Slaughterhouse-Five
“Then there was the bad weather.”—Ernest Hemingway, Moveable Feast
But in all seriousness, we as a community were very fortunate to come out of this event mostly unscathed. It may take a little while to get back to normal, but considering what could have happened, we are very lucky indeed! I want to say a special thank you to my good buddy, Andy Jones, who was out clearing trees off of Frederica Road just hours after Matthew blew through. He truly embodies what it means to be a good neighbor! Also, Harrison Sapp, Griffin Bufkin, and their crew at Southern Soul, and Chef Dave Snyder of Halyards and Tramici went above and beyond, feeding the many workers who were getting the power and water back up and running. Those guys don’t just talk the talk, they walk the walk!
Now let’s get those tourists back down here!
