The Southern Cocktail Party is a St. Simons and Sea Island legacy. Two Golden Isles tastemakers, Jennifer Daniel and Emily Been, are bringing back the art of gathering with a totally fresh take. So, pull out yellow legal pads and jot down some notes. Mingling from 6:00 p.m. to 8:00 p.m. has never gone out of style. Reach for silver trays, glassware, and linen cocktail napkins. September’s soirée season has begun.
But first, a quick look back to The Island Cocktail Party Circuit when flair was welcome, boredom unwelcome, and attire de rigueur.
A Look Back: The Island Cocktail Party Circuit
Drinks, bites, laughter, and light conversation had a playbook back in the day, and planning was part of the pleasure. A hostess, or group of hostesses, settled on a date, guestlist, and menu. Formal invitations were postmarked, RSVPs requested, and legal notepads filled with to-dos, weeks in advance.
Who, What, Wear
Dresses, heels, and a clutch for her.
Blazers, loafers, no socks, and perhaps a bowtie, for him.
And by all means, book the babysitter!
Favorite valets, bartenders, and babysitters were booked. Linen cocktail napkins, tablecloths, silver trays, and ice buckets appeared on dining room tables, along with rows of votives and cherished cut crystal vases for fresh flowers.
On more than one occasion—and it wasn’t considered a bad thing—certain in-demand guests received multiple invitations for the same night. This involved an evening of “island hopping” and some fancy footwork. Not attending both was a non-option. The big question: which one first?
The Guest List
The guest list, considered the most important element of a good party, included a mix of island characters…architects, artists, lawyers, doctors, dentists, tennis players, golfers from the Mid-West, seasonal transplants, business types, trust funders from the Northeast, florists, decorators, Island Players, and anyone who could share a good tale with a rocks glass in hand.
Kids watched parents head out the door promptly at 5:55 p.m. on a Thursday, Friday, or Saturday evening in fancy wear. As cars pulled away, like a well-timed symphony, young babysitters on both islands would pop TV dinners in the oven, and everyone would have a swell time.
Today: Move Past Perfection
In today’s pursuit of Instagrammable perfection, both Jennifer and Emily advise letting go of stress and embrace a bit of tarnish. Party planning is personal, and there is no one way to throw a good time.
Jennifer begins with the number: how many people to invite and which silver trays to pull out, and Emily dives headfirst into the menu. Both hearken back to family as inspiration, while preparing.
Grandmother’s Silver Trays and Glassware Deserve Another Round
Jennifer uses some of her grandmother’s cherished silver trays and a mix and match of serving pieces.
“Growing up so close to both my grandmothers is a big part of why I love using their things. I love telling my girls stories about each piece. Silver, china, old glass and crystal all hold special meaning to me. Some people might think it's fancy, but to me it feels like home.”
Jennifer Daniel
Emily brings out beautiful Heisey glassware from her grandmother.
“I’ve always loved the idea that the pieces we inherit aren’t meant to sit tucked away in a cabinet. For me, cooking and hosting have always gone hand in hand. I grew up in the kitchen cooking with my mom, just as she grew up cooking with her mom. So much of what I love about food comes from recipes, traditions, and little things that have been passed down through generations.”
Emily Been
Add in an assortment of linen cocktail napkins, handed down, mixed with fun new options for a splash.
“Don’t be worried about stains on the linen napkins. Somehow our grandmothers always got them out with a good soaking.”
Jennifer Daniel
Impromptu Drop-By Tips
Sometimes spur of the moment parties are the best kind. A quick call to friends to “drop by” after work or to kick off the weekend turns into The Night to Remember. Here are some tips for the dew-drop ins:
- Always have meat, cheese, crackers and nuts on hand—sparkling water is a must and wine, both red and white.
- Snippers come in handy: clip a few flowers or greenery from the yard or garden and place in any tall glass or container within reach.
- Nothing sets a festive mood like a bit of flicker. Dim the overheads and place candles on the coffee table and kitchen island. Watch end-of-week stress melt away.
The Mailed Invitation
Emily and Jennifer appreciate the return of a proper invitation received through the mail vs. an evite. Digital is good in a pinch or when pressed for time.
“I always keep an invitation and have a whole box filled with the ones I like. It doesn’t matter what the event is. I love to look back at them for inspiration and to remember the occasion.”
Emily Been
Music Sets the Mood
Have a curated playlist of faves with a little bit of the unexpected. Crooners like Bublé and greats like Billie Holiday help break the ice. Mix genres and styles to hit a high note with guests.
Introduce Guests
Play the host or hostess. Do not assume your hot yoga friends know your next-door neighbors. Introduce guests with a bit of information about each other to jump start conversation.
A Southern-inspired Sample Cocktail Party Menu
by Emily Been, Private Chef and Owner of Dinner Plans
- Lightly breaded and fried olives stuffed with sausage
- Lemony beet hummus and Crudité with fresh veggies from Farm 99 in Sterling, Georgia
- Marinated shrimp ceviche-style with a bit of a kick
- Homemade cheese straws (Tip: Emily and Jennifer both recommend Sugarbakers in Brunswick for cheese straws if in a pinch.)
- Spiced pecans (Tip: Emily adds a tiny bit of brown sugar for a spicy, slightly sweet punch.)
- Another mix of assorted nuts (It’s really true: guests gravitate to a good nut mix.)
- A variety of crackers (Be sure to include gluten-free options.)
- The Southern Cocktail Party Surprise: homemade chocolate chip cookies. Perfect as a grab-and-go on the way out.
Jennifer Daniel is the owner of Polished Peyton. She grew up in a small Louisiana town, 100 yards from one grandmother and two miles from the other. She uses stories and humor to teach etiquette skills relevant in today's world and loves to speak about the importance of gathering with others and using special heirloom pieces to make parties special and guests feel at home. She can be reached at Jennifer@polishedpeyton.com, @polishedpeyton and polishedpeyton.com.
Born and raised on St. Simons Island, Emily Been is a private chef and owner of Dinner Plans. She loves planning, cooking, and putting together traditional dishes and recipes that have a history with a fresh, new take. She can be reached at emily@mydinnerplans.com, @mydinnerplans and mydinnerplans.com.
